Dushkin the proletariat drifter scum with an uncanny attraction to cookies and Moruku, whose title was censored for your safety step out of their darkened rooms briefly, get together once a week and exchange a record. Each must listen to the record continuously at least once, write a review, give it a score, and return the week for more. Stay tuned for more as they bring you the Record Exchange.

I can complain all I want, I don’t like Christmas. For me to receive a Christmas record, is like getting a knitted sweater. I pretend to like it, but I’m actually disgusted by how stick and kitchy it is.

However, this time, I’m pretty satisfied. No kidding, satisfied. So what if it’s a chistmas record, it sure doesn’t sound like one.

Moruku has crazes, and it comes and goes. This time, he was Christmas-obsessed. I remember last year, the guy held a poker face and insisted he’s a buddhist. This year, he even went shopping for christmas. I tend to suspect it has something to do with his newly acquired girlfriend. (Note: yes, I insist she’s your girlfriend.)

Having just heard that someone I used to idle with on IRC just died, so listening to Los Straitjackets just isn’t what I want to listen to, so no, I won’t relisten to the record, but just work from memory. I know this is a record review, but I have to interject here. Seriously, I join ##otw for a mere ten minutes and I already at that point I wish I never did. Really, “rot in pees”, that’s what they said. They started arguing about how long his session’s been inactive. Ever read The Stranger? It’s sort of like that. Kids, don’t do drugs, because that’s what happens, you OD and nobody gives a crap.

To define Season, I’d say it’s a mix between surf rock and what sounds like that latino. I can definitely hear the influence.

Luckily, Los Straitjackets managed to avoid those horrible bells that people keep putting in Christmas-related everything. I did hear them being used in “I Wanna Be Your Dog” (The Stooges), and that was good, but besides that - sorry, nothing.

I, as a Christmas-hater, feel this record could have scored higher.

Verdict: 6 out of 10 Santas.

Moruku is supposed to be doing a review as we speak. And I thought mine was overdue. Stick around for the next review.

Well then. My MacBook showed three main problems. The first being the well documented discoloration, the second being the screen’s slight flicker which can really annoy you after a while, and the third being a blob on the screen where the backlight was much weaker than it should have been, in turn causing it to appear as a dark BLOB on the screen. I dropped my MacBook by Humac several weeks ago on the 18th last month. I figured it should have been ready two days ago, and that if it hadn’t been, they needed a fair flogging to make sure they finish it on time. Fair enough, I thought, and called two days ago to check up on it:

Me: “Hi, could you check on my machine, I put it in repair a while ago, the number is Rxxxxx”
Moron A: “Well, let me see.”
(pause)
Moron A: “It’s number 21… no, 16 in the line.”
Me: “What?!”
Moron A: “You know, parts from Apple, and there were a lot of machines needing repair, . Besides, it’s only been 8 workdays since you gave it to Humac.”

Right, I did the math. That same day, all the way through to Friday, 5. Add to that the next week, sans Monday and Tuesday, 3. He got it right, 3 + 5 = 8. I read a little on the receipt where it clearly stated that within 10 days I could expect it to be repaired.

I called today again.

Moron B: “Sorry, they’re still working on it, they need parts. They ordered them today, which means they’re getting them tomorrow. I see they ordered an outside case and a new keyboard?”
Me: “That wasn’t the only problem, I also have a huge dark blob on my screen and the intensity of the backlight flickers.”
Moron B: “Oh, no, the ‘black dot on the left-hand side of the screen’ is normal.” (apparently translating my exact complaint’s text as it appeared on my receipt.)
Me: “No it’s not normal, it’s a huge blob and I can definitely notice it. It’s a problem with the backlight.”
Moron B: “Oh…”
Me: “Look, I gave it on Monday the 18th last month, they had plenty of time to order whatever spare parts they needed, but they didn’t even look at the serious issues! I need it by Monday!”
Moron B: “The parts arrive Friday and the technicians don’t work on weekends.” (pause) Moron B: “OK, I wrote the technician an email about it.”

Now why am I not happy with the way they handled my problem? Because, well, this whole thing is going to take at least another week if I’m lucky, and it’s already late. They just sort of looked at it and ordered a new case, but all this bullshit about the screen being “just fine”, I’m sorry,but I don’t buy that crap. I wish I never even gave it to them.

Conclusion? Humac is to blame. Apple’s just fine, but Humac’s technicians are dumb enough not to order my parts on time, to turn a blind eye on my problems and better yet to be late with a repair that’s so trivial I want to take a sword and stab myself in the eye. They could have ordered those parts already, and besides, just how much trouble could it be to just replace a fucking piece of plastic, I’m not asking for much. And all the while, they didn’t even touch my other problems.

Again, Apple isn’t to blame, and I’m happy I bought a MacBook rather than just any other generic laptop. It’s a great machine. Since Apple isn’t responsible for what happens in Denmark, where Humac does all the repairs, it gets out clean.

Another reason to hate Christmas, for turning proper business days into nonsesical holidays. All because of a Jeebus, the first humac popsickle in recorded history - Jew on a Stick.

Well, the shopping aspect of christmas is apparently the concept of this gift exchange doesn’t stem from the actual nature of the holiday per se, but evolved much later.

What I’m saying here is not solid historical fact, do don’t take it as that.

I wouldn’t be surprised if Christmas came to replace a different holiday that came around that time, and all that religious bullshit came much later, I wouldn’t doubt it.

So, buying presents I guess, is a part of the whole thing with coming over to someone else’s house. You don’t come empty handed to something like that, you know, so you bring something over, that’s a probable hypothesis.

I don’t think anyone could possibly say for certain why this gift exchange actually exists, but it’s there. Even hannukah has some sort of a gift exchange, which strengthens my previous point that christmas was a common holiday in which some sort of meaning was injected much later.

Well, I don’t know.

No, I’m not gonna wish you all a “merry christmas”, how’s that!